The Time My “Why” Stopped Working

It was almost 20 years ago, but I remember the feeling like it was yesterday.

Everything looked great on paper, but I wasn’t inspired. There was this growing uncertainty present in every moment, this quiet questioning about whether I was on the right path.

What confused me was that I thought I was living on purpose.

I was building the business I had chosen, I cared deeply about the people I worked with, and I was making a real, measurable difference for my clients. So why did I feel flat?

I wasn’t depressed. I wasn’t burned out. In many measurable ways, my life was better than ever.

And yet I remember thinking:

“Why am I struggling to be excited about a career I was genuinely excited about just a few months ago? This is not how I expected to be feeling.”

So I did something I hadn’t done in a while. I took a moment to pause and connect with what my deeper self had been trying to say.

And what I discovered surprised me.
I was living from a purpose that had already done its job.

There had been a season where that purpose was exactly right. It empowered me to build, provide, protect, and create stability. But something was missing.

Not because that purpose was “bad.” It was clear. It was productive. I was using my gifts to help people.

It just wasn’t current.

And when purpose isn’t current, even a good life starts to feel like an uphill climb with no lookout in sight.

Purpose isn’t a sentence you write once. It’s a living conversation you keep having with yourself.

Because you’re not the same person you were five years ago, and you won’t be the same person five years from now.

Your family will change. Your responsibilities will change. Your passions will change. Your perspective will change. So why would your purpose remain the same?

Here’s what shifted everything for me. I stopped asking, “How do I fulfill the purpose I decided on?” And I started asking: “What matters most to me right now?”

Not theoretically. Not what sounded right. Not what earned applause.

What really matters most to me in this season of my life?

And once I began asking that question, everything shifted.

My attention got sharper. My decisions got simpler. My energy returned.

Not because life got easier, but because I aligned my effort with a purpose that was actually true for who I was becoming. That alignment is a big part of how we create flow; it arises when what you’re doing makes sense. It facilitates what is important.

So if you’ve been feeling any quiet friction lately, consider this:

You may not need a new strategy to fulfill a purpose you chose years ago. You may need a new “why” for the season you’re actually in.

How to tap into your purpose now

Don’t set out to write a perfect purpose statement.

Just notice:

What are you doing that feels alive?

What are you doing that feels obligatory but empty?

Where are you over-delivering to an old identity?

Because your purpose is a compass, not a contract. And when it’s aligned with what truly matters most to you now, flow becomes the natural consequence.

Invitation

In The Flow Cultivator (my signature program), living on purpose has nothing to do with crafting the perfect phrase.

Instead, we use purpose as a dynamic part of your identity system, so your story, values, strengths, and schedule all pull you toward the impact that lights you up.

My purpose is to help people tap into their gifts and passions, so they can live inspired lives of joy and impact.

If you feel like it might be time to reconnect to a purpose that actually fits your life now, reply in the comments below “Purpose Now” and I’ll reach out to you.